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A WHEEL OF TIME COMMUNITY

25 thoughts I've had while reading New Spring


Diana Petrescu

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So this is a list of my HUMOROUS impressions while reading the first book I ever read in the Wheel of time series: New Spring. This is done strictly for fun so if you enjoy it, I may continue with the rest of the books as I read them. Also, I hope I put this in the right board, if not, I beg the admins to move it to its appropiate section.

 

Ok, here we go, spin the wheel.

 

1. This Lan dude be walking around like his s**t don't stink and he's the ultimate bad-ass.

 

2. He's pretty bad-ass though. Getting some definite Aragorn vibes. 

 

3. Aiel be like: PSYCHE! Made you look.

 

4. This chick has a vision of a baby being born and she dies. I get how she feels. It's like when I see baby pictures from people I used to hate in highschool popping up all over my Facebook. Only with more death. 

 

5. Moiraine is short, Siuan is ghetto. Got it.

 

6. The White Tower is like the Female Bad-ass Academy.

 

7. So you channel the female part of the Power, by weaving elements in different formula depending on what you want to achieve. It was so much easier when all you had to do was "feel the force".

 

8. The only book I've ever read that makes the "shawl" a symbol of power as opposed to a symbol of grandmotheriness.

 

9. How sheltered are these girls cause I get the feeling they don't get out much.

 

10. That being said, ALWAYS PACK A SEWING KIT.

 

11. I guess condoms made out of sheep intestines or something are not a thing in this universe.

 

12. I'm kinda digging this whole matriarchy thing. 

 

13. I don't exactly know what went on in Moiraine's testing, but she was definitely naked for part of it

 

14. Lan is not having Moiraine's s**t.

 

15. Moiraine is not having Lan's s**t. 

 

16. Not really sure if I ship it though. I'm kinda digging Soiraine right now. 

 

17. If you want a name to sound fantasy-ish, it's all about the vowel placement. 

 

18. Moiraine to Lan: "Surprise, b***h! I bet you thought you've seen the last of me"

 

19. Carneira... "Well hello, Mrs Robinson"

 

20. Black Ajah be like: "the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice"

 

21. Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the... FLOOOOOOOOOOOR.

 

22. I'm in lesbians with Moiraine, pun intended.

 

23. Moiraine: Saving people, hunting things, the family business. 

Lan: But I wanna go to college. 

 

24. Before finishing, I just want to mention that swearing is pretty f***ing hilarious in this book.

 

25. "We win this battle, or the world dies"

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I like your humor, but it tends to be easier to really get into New Spring if you read it in publication order (between Books 10 and 11). Starting off with the prequel means you miss all sorts of stuff from not being familiar with the series.

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  • 2 weeks later...

My first time of the prequel was just before my second time through the series.  My first time through the series was books 1 through 12.

 

on #4 of the list, "soon to be born" I guess would be more accurate than "being born".

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  • 2 years later...

So this is a list of my HUMOROUS impressions while reading the first book I ever read in the Wheel of time series: New Spring. This is done strictly for fun so if you enjoy it, I may continue with the rest of the books as I read them. Also, I hope I put this in the right board, if not, I beg the admins to move it to its appropiate section.

 

Ok, here we go, spin the wheel.

 

1. This Lan dude be walking around like his s**t don't stink and he's the ultimate bad-ass.

 

2. He's pretty bad-ass though. Getting some definite Aragorn vibes.

 

3. Aiel be like: PSYCHE! Made you look.

 

4. This chick has a vision of a baby being born and she dies. I get how she feels. It's like when I see baby pictures from people I used to hate in highschool popping up all over my Facebook. Only with more death.

 

5. Moiraine is short, Siuan is ghetto. Got it.

 

6. The White Tower is like the Female Bad-ass Academy.

 

7. So you channel the female part of the Power, by weaving elements in different formula depending on what you want to achieve. It was so much easier when all you had to do was "feel the force".

 

8. The only book I've ever read that makes the "shawl" a symbol of power as opposed to a symbol of grandmotheriness.

 

9. How sheltered are these girls cause I get the feeling they don't get out much.

 

10. That being said, ALWAYS PACK A SEWING KIT.

 

11. I guess condoms made out of sheep intestines or something are not a thing in this universe.

 

12. I'm kinda digging this whole matriarchy thing.

 

13. I don't exactly know what went on in Moiraine's testing, but she was definitely naked for part of it

 

14. Lan is not having Moiraine's s**t.

 

15. Moiraine is not having Lan's s**t.

 

16. Not really sure if I ship it though. I'm kinda digging Soiraine right now.

 

17. If you want a name to sound fantasy-ish, it's all about the vowel placement.

 

18. Moiraine to Lan: "Surprise, b***h! I bet you thought you've seen the last of me"

 

19. Carneira... "Well hello, Mrs Robinson"

 

20. Black Ajah be like: "the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice"

 

21. Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the... FLOOOOOOOOOOOR.

 

22. I'm in lesbians with Moiraine, pun intended.

 

23. Moiraine: Saving people, hunting things, the family business.

Lan: But I wanna go to college.

 

24. Before finishing, I just want to mention that swearing is pretty f***ing hilarious in this book.

 

25. "We win this battle, or the world dies"

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