Red Ajah's International Women's Week: Crimes Against Women

[Moon Sedai]

Welcome to the Red Ajah’s International Women’s Week!



This year, we’ve chosen a theme very near and dear to many of our hearts,

Crimes Against Women.

The official US Government page concerning Crimes against Women: http://www.ovw.usdoj.gov/

 

We’ll be hosting a number of threads and Events this week involving Crimes and Violence against women.

For record’s sake, I’ll be putting links to the threads here. 

 

Moon's Thread Violence Against Women in the Media

Hallia's Thread Women and Equality

Panchi's Thread :Girl Child

[Nolder]

Hi, I've got a small bone to pick. I'm not sure if this was for general use or just the work of one user but I saw a signature promoting this event that had some misleading information on it.

 

Anyway the bone, or rather bones I should say. At one point during all the flashing statistics the image states "Factoring in unreported rapes, about 6% of rapists will [n]ever spend a day in jail. 15 out of 16 will walk free." Now that sounds pretty awful at first glance and I can understand how no one really thought about it (because hey who's for defending rapists right?) but that isn't accurate or right. First of all as unreported rapes are...unreported we can't know how many go unreported so grabbing the "about 6%" statistic is dubious from the start. If you throw in cases of false rape claims that confuses the statistic even further. Second thing is the claim that "about 6%" or "15 out of 16" (isn't that closer to 90%?) will walk free. This is extremely misleading because in western society which I'm assuming these infographics are mainly meant to represent there is usually a presumption of innocence in law, more commonly to referred to by the phrase "innocent until proven guilty". This means that these rapists that are walking free are not actually rapists. Oh we can be sure that it happens that criminals will sometimes get away with their crimes but in this case it is not correct to refer to these people as rapists. They either have not been brought to court and found guilty or they have been found innocent. In either case these people are not legally, or statistically, rapists. And my last bone to pick is that men are raped too. I understand that this is an event surrounding women and is about women's issues but that's kind of my point. Rape is not a women's issue. It's a human issue. This is actually a gripe I have with most of this event. A lot of the talking points are about things that effect men too such as domestic violence and sexual assault. It's sad that these have been taken as "women's issues" when they effect so many men as well. 

[Panchi]

Nolder, i don't know the correctness of siggys but i believe that it is the impact that matters. You may be right from western culture but if you look at it through the world women are never treated equally. It can be that the some siggys are meant to represent only a certain region.

And in many countries the charges go unnoticed because of one simple reason- bribes. You bribe the police and they don't do anything.

Rape may be a problem of humankind but men don't have to worry about assaulted, raped and then left in a condition where death sounds sweet but cannot be possible. They don't have to worry about that woman who would be isolated from society for something that happened against her through no fault of hers. I believe you never heard about woman being sold as wives, turned into slaves. You may say problem is of humankind but it is woman, especially of asian and african countries, who suffer the most.

[Nolder]

Nolder, i don't know the correctness of siggys but i believe that it is the impact that matters. You may be right from western culture but if you look at it through the world women are never treated equally. It can be that the some siggys are meant to represent only a certain region.

I'm sure that they do. It seems to go back and forth and that in itself is rather confusing I think. It conflates the different issues women face in western society (which is fairly free but still has issues) with the issues women face in non western societies (which tend to be not as free and riddled with major issues).

 

Rape may be a problem of humankind but men don't have to worry about assaulted, raped and then left in a condition where death sounds sweet but cannot be possible. They don't have to worry about that woman who would be isolated from society for something that happened against her through no fault of hers.

Men absolutely have to worry about such things. Prison rape is rampant and all but condoned. 

 

I believe you never heard about woman being sold as wives, turned into slaves. You may say problem is of humankind but it is woman, especially of asian and african countries, who suffer the most.

I've heard of it. Human trafficking is actually a pretty big issue at least in states bordering Mexico.

---

I'm not trying to turn this into a contest of who has it worse and who deserves more recognition. I'm sorry if I came off that way.

[Elgee]

Just for your information, the latest statistics in South Africa are as follows:

 

1 in 3 women living in South Africa will get raped AT LEAST ONCE in their lives.

1 in 4 men living in South Africa has ADMITTED raping a woman.

[Nolder]

Thanks, I didn't know that one actually.

[TylerRVG]

Just for your information, the latest statistics in South Africa are as follows:

 

1 in 3 women living in South Africa will get raped AT LEAST ONCE in their lives.

1 in 4 men living in South Africa has ADMITTED raping a woman.

 

Source? (Out of curiosity)

[michellem]

My god Elgee, that is terrifying to say the last.

[Panchi]

Every 2 hours, a woman is raped or sexually assaulted in New Delhi(source:hindustan times)

[Elgee]

 

Just for your information, the latest statistics in South Africa are as follows:

 

1 in 3 women living in South Africa will get raped AT LEAST ONCE in their lives.

1 in 4 men living in South Africa has ADMITTED raping a woman.

 

Source? (Out of curiosity)

 

One of the leading newspapers, Die Burger.

[Elgee]

Every 2 hours, a woman is raped or sexually assaulted in New Delhi(source:hindustan times)

 

That is truly horrific.

[Gudrean]

I believe the misunderstanding comes in that most crimes against women are done in domestic situations and mostly with the consent or at least turned heads of local/state/govt authority. As for these same crimes against men incarcerated, it too is a damn shame and most definitely a crime, but it is not the same as living a supposed free life where you fear every man you encounter that he just might force something horrific on you and then blame you for it's happening, as you asked for it or deserved it!!!  when it comes to sex crimes and trafficking against children I believe boys and girls are equally assaulted as the pedophile nation loves little boys and little girls alike!!!

 

one of my many missions in life is to expose and destroy this facet of sickness in society.... May the day come sooner than later

 

 

 

oh and  **curtseys** Good Day to you Mother =)

[Elgee]

Well spoken, Gudrean :)

[Moon Sedai]

One other thing- There is the idea that a lot of women falsely report rape. 

That is not as common as it may be thought.

 

The FBI reports that 8% of rape reports are unfounded HOWEVER.....

If the Victim and Accused had a previous sexual relationship 

OR no evidence of physical abuse (bruises) are found on the victim *or* ther is not proof of a weapon used, then the FBI considers it Unfounded. 

 

UNFOUNDED DOES NOT MEAN FALSE ACCUSATION. 

 

Women can be raped by Husbands, Boyfriends, girlfriends, or whatever current sexual partner they have. 

 

Legal research has determined that it is  impossible to discern the actual rate of false allegations. 

(Wikipedia false allegations of rape).

Don't let the idea of false allegations of rape play with the statistics. 

[Nolder]

So you're denying that they happen at all? Because if they DO happen then they DO effect statistics.

[Gudrean]

It has occured to me that this tone being taken with the lovely lady running this thread is indeed a form of the same concept of aggression towards women and should be ceased. There is simply no need for this . 

[Tsukibana]

It has occured to me that this tone being taken with the lovely lady running this thread is indeed a form of the same concept of aggression towards women and should be ceased. There is simply no need for this . 

 

 

So because Nolder is aggressively defending his opinion against a woman's opinion, he's aggressive against women, and not defending his stand point?!?!?

[Gudrean]

I named no names on purpose and yet you assume I am talking about Nolder, when in fact there are several males taking a defensive tone with the ladies running these threads as if they themselves (the males) are being called out as perpetrators of these crimes. The ladies are offering facts from statistics and not opinions alone. So to answer your question, No, I dare not assume anyone on DM is themself aggressive towards women in RL, but the way one responds to such discussions most definitely says something about their disposition on said subjects. I will leave it to you and them to decide what it means to you. 

[Tsukibana]

my apologies, but as Nolder was the only male on "this thread" (your words) defending his opinion, I assumed it was him you were speaking of. 

Shall the conversation now steer itself back towards the issue at hand?

 

Potentially scary idea: Have any of our lovely DM women been the victims of a crime because they were women?? I'm sure that 

hearing first hand the fear that they might have felt would be... eye-opening for many people. Numbers and stats are impersonal,

but people you know (even through the interweb)... that can change many thoughts.

 

Would, perhaps, one of the women staff put out a thread asking for women in this situation to share their stories??

(Or is this just a horrible idea?)

[Elgee]

It has occured to me that this tone being taken with the lovely lady running this thread is indeed a form of the same concept of aggression towards women and should be ceased. There is simply no need for this . 

 

Thank you. I will stand with this. The next person who steps over the line (and since I'm the SGL here, I draw the line), will be asked to leave. This is an extremely sensitive topic to women in general, and to several of us on here in particular. Don't expect me to be 100% impartial.

 

And in case you missed it - this event is officially International WOMEN'S week. If anyone would like to host an International MEN'S week, I'll be more than happy to accommodate you.

[Elgee]

Would, perhaps, one of the women staff put out a thread asking for women in this situation to share their stories??

 

(Or is this just a horrible idea?)

 

It is not a horrible idea at all, I just don't know if many would be willing to share their stories. I don't know if I would, to be honest. If anyone is willing to host it, they can, though.

[Nolder]

Having been the only male besides Tyler to have even posted in this thread prior to your post and having obviously made complaints about accuracy it can only be assumed you were referring to me Gudrean. If you had a problem with my "tone" you could have just said so. You can read my "tone" as being aggressive (or defensive? you've said both now) if you want to but I'm just calling out what should be obvious misconceptions about some of the statistics being toted. Which are not sourced I might add, which is the issue Tyler had.

[Gudrean]

 

It has occured to me that this tone being taken with the lovely lady running this thread is indeed a form of the same concept of aggression towards women and should be ceased. There is simply no need for this . 

 

Thank you. I will stand with this. The next person who steps over the line (and since I'm the SGL here, I draw the line), will be asked to leave. This is an extremely sensitive topic to women in general, and to several of us on here in particular. Don't expect me to be 100% impartial.

 

And in case you missed it - this event is officially International WOMEN'S week. If anyone would like to host an International MEN'S week, I'll be more than happy to accommodate you.

I would love to host a topic for men's week. =) and any members that would like to participate with me would be wonderful.

[Mystica]

I am a fervent advocat of freedom of opinion and equality. Provided that it does not lead to harming another person. Most of the time that distinction is not made and the concept of freedom of opinion is ABused to do or say whatever one feels like, regardless the consequences. Common sense, empathy and basic decency are not to be trampled with. In the absence of these, folks ought to shut their yap and leave the talking to those with more than two braincells.

 

 

In answer to one of the questions in this thread, I am a survivor of several sexual attacks in my youth.

 

The first when I was 5 years old was done by my uncle of 19 years old. It took over 20 years before he was trialed and found guilty. In order for this to happen this is what it took:

- he assaulted his oldest daughter for years (started on her when she was about  5 or 6 years old)

- the outbreak of the Dutroux tragedy that caused a nation wide cry for justice for childrape victims

- the Dutroux tragedy caused a flood of information sessions at schools for children of all ages to come forward if they knew anything like this happened in their facinity

- his intention of starting on his second daughter when she turned 6 years old

- his oldest daughter wanting to save her sister stepped up at school and finally spoke up.

 

He was sentenced to 7 years. He spent effectively 3 years. His daughter and I got life.


And no, just because he was never tried and found guilty in those 20 years prior to him going to court, that did not NOT make him a child molester. It made him an uncaught child molester.

 

 

The second I was 12 years old. Due to circumstances beyond my controle or fault I was placed in a foster home. My role: maid to the wife and playmate to the son and father.

The father never was accused, never went to court, never went to jail.


I challenge anyone to come to me in person and tell me to my face that father was innocent. Just try it. I'm no longer 5 and I'm no longer 12.

 

 

I have lived with girls that literally dived behind parked cars and in to door niches on the street because they 'thought' they saw their father's car passing by. Girls that were used as sexual favors by all the males in the family and their friends. And this was KNOWN for these girls were placed in homes. The purpetrators were known, but were never brought to justice. Instead those girls were forced to 'reintegrate' in those abusing families. Leading one of them to go up on a roof ready to jump because she was being forced to go home to a father that had sexually abused her since she could walk. I was the one who had to talk her off the roof. I was 16 at the time. She was 14. Why? Because those social workers had come up with a novelty program and it was more important that they get status in their community of social workers than getting justice for those girls. Getting a paper published in a journal was more important than the emotional and psychological well being of young teenage children. They were in homes, who cares right? Society didn't care. Society was secure in the knowledge that something was done for these poor kids. What happened behind closed doors was no one's business. And if they could save on court expenses that way, all the better.

 

 

I live in Belgium. Not a third world country. Not a second world country. A western country. It happens. Everywhere. Now. And it is NEVER ok!! NOT EVER!!

[Gudrean]

Mystica, thank you for being so brave and so frank by sharing your experiences in this subject. I have never been the victim of actual rape in my current lifetime, but I have been molested several times by people who were not strangers. First was a neighbor who also molested his two daughters, I was 9? The next person was an uncle, he only tried with me but got interrupted. He molested most of the girls in his family. I was 10. Next was my own brother, I was 12, it only happened once. The next time was at age 12 as well and it was my mother's boyfriend, she did not know about it. He didn't accomplish much with me but succeeded with my 10 year old cousin one night when she spent the night. I told my Mom and my family went after him, but he fled the country. When I was 14, a boy I was dating, tried to force himself on me at a baseball field. And lastly I was at a friend of mines house and his 16 yr old cousin was visiting and he locked me in a room and held my arms above my head with one hand and tried using the other hand to take off my clothes. This was the most scary of all the occurrences. I was lucky this time as well in that my friend broke down the door and stopped anything extreme from happening. Non the less, these experiences have stuck with me and have painted a scene of fear and distrust anytime I found myself alone with a male or multiple males that I did not know or have personal experiences with. I love men even so and do not assume that all men are out to hurt me, but I am less free of mind and have to be extra cautious in my choices. I guess in some ways you could say these experiences have helped me in a society where these things are portrayed and perpetrated on a regular basis. My caution has probably saved me a lot of pain and suffering. However I would rather have my innocence restored and live in a world of peace and safety where I could openly trust and love all people I encounter.