Jump to content


Photo

Week 2: Birgitte vs. Min


  • This topic is locked This topic is locked
41 replies to this topic

Poll: Week 2: Birgitte vs. Min (246 member(s) have cast votes)

Who will win?

  1. Birgitte (212 votes [86.18%])

    Percentage of vote: 86.18%

  2. Min (34 votes [13.82%])

    Percentage of vote: 13.82%

Vote

#1 Dwynwen

Dwynwen
  • Administrators
  • 6,735 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Redlands, California

Posted 22 January 2012 - 02:06 PM

Posted Image

Write-up by: Luckers

The Contestants

Birgitte
Age: There is no beginning nor end to the turning of the Wheel of Time. [so you try and quantify that into a viable age bracket]
Race: Human
Weapon: the Bow, her fists.
Special: Millenia of Heroics

Elmindreda Farshaw
Age: Early to mid twenties.
Race: Human
Weapon: Knives
Special: Can see the future.

The Breakdown

Advantages
Birgitte: Millenia of experience as a fighter. Has a wooden leg for drinking. Has hips which don't lie.
Elmindreda: Can see the future. Taught to use Knives by Thom and Aiel. Has a spunky personality.

Disadvantages
Birgitte: Can be a triffle moody (not her fault).
Elmindreda: Has a really dumb name.

How we think the fight will go


Birgitte was three kinds of don’t-f##k-with-me drunk, and she had not forgotten that Min Farshaw had turned up in the Royal Palace with a man ugly enough to make her forget all about her Gaidal. The little trollop sat in a small clearing not far from where Elayne had placed her tent when she had arrived at Merrilor, playing cats cradle while she waited for al’Thor to finish his visit with Elayne. Visit? Birgitte snorted—by the ruckus in her head a whole lot more than simple visitation was occurring.

Idly, Birgitte drew an arrow, running her finger along the sharp edge. Drunk as a skunk or not she could still put an arrow through the girl’s throat at a hundred paces without trying. She grinned at the thought—that’d stop the rigmarole going on in Elayne’s tent. Stop it quick smart.

At that moment Min looked up and saw her standing there. She frowned, studying her—no, studying the air above her head. Something about that struck Birgitte’s memory, about people who could see the future around a person, but the specifics would not come—whether lost to the fading of her memory, or to the fortified wine she’d been drinking, she did not know.

Min rose, and in a casual saunter that made Birgitte want to hit her, wandered towards her. Birgitte watched her come, sourly, fingering the arrow. When the girl stood in front of her, she squatted. “Alright then Birgitte?”

“Fine.”

“You sure? Because from what I see, you have some pretty insane intentions right now,” Birgitte scowled at her, sulkily, and the girl continued, “they’re wavering, which I have never really seen before, but they’re there.” Min glanced down at the nearly empty wine skin. “I thought you weren’t drinking while Elayne was pregnant.”

She hadn’t been. She wasn’t—except, she was drunk. Why had she started drinking? A particularly exuberant jolt of the bond reminded her. Well, why was this little chit judging her anyway?

“I think you should sleep it off, and then we can talk in the morning.”

“Don’t tell me what to do,” she told the girl, or rather, tried to. It came out more ‘doan telme whata do.’

“Come on Birgitte, I’ll help you to your tent.”

Min grabbed her arm, pulling her to her feet, where she swayed. The indignity of it all was bringing the rage to a fierce boil—which coincided with what was going on in her head, but she didn’t want to think about that. The girl was murmuring soothingly, which did not help. Idiot child! Did she think she was special because she wore pants? Birgitte had been wearing pants for millennia!

Sliding her booted heel in behind Min’s ankle, she used a particularly dirty throw she’d learned growing up on the streets of Senje, and the girl actually squawked as she went down, and wasn’t that gratifying! Gaidal had always said she had no humour, but she thought she was rather funny, thank you very much.

It would have ended there had Farshaw the sense to stay down, but instead the girl twisted, and kicked Birgitte solidly in the midriff. Birgitte staggered back trying desperately not to be sick, and then grunted as Min sailed out of nowhere to tackle her, and then they were rolling in the dirt, elbows and fists flying wild, and suddenly Birgitte was having the time of her life. How long had it been since she had been in a good drunken brawl? A long time certainly—prissy mcqueenypants would never approve!

Somehow the girl managed to score a good right hook across her face, but then Birgitte slugged her hard in the short ribs, followed by a head butt to the face. She’d used just that combination on Gaidal once, during a street fight in Shiota, and he hadn’t liked it any more than Min. Twisting them both, Birgitte ended up on top of the girl, holding one of her hands flat to the ground. In the girls other hand, however, a knife had appeared.

“Birgitte, enough!” Min said sharply.

Birgitte grinned, and using her other hand caught the girls wrist and squeezed just so, and the knife twisted and…

“Oh…” Birgitte and Min said at precisely the same time, but in very different tones. Suddenly the cacophony in Birgitte’s head stopped, and at the same time all the pent up frustration—that she now realised the bond had been enhancing—disappeared, leaving Birgitte a more normal drunk.

“Oh Min,” she said, trying to stop the flow of blood that was seeping out around the knife that now stuck out of the girl’s chest. “Hang on, I’ll get an Aes Sedai—”

“No,” the girl wheezed, blood on her lips. “Too late. I see it… always right.”

“It’s not too late, we can—”

“Too late,” the girl repeated, the light beginning to fade from her dark eyes. “Too late, but listen, I have to tell you… to tell you about Gaidal…”

Birgitte froze, “Tell me what about Gaidal?”

“He…”

“He what? Min? Do you know where Gaidal is?”

“He is…”

“Where is he, Min? Who is he?”

“He… is not Olver….”

The light went from Min’s eyes, and nearby she could hear al’Thor screaming, but she could not bring herself to care. Gaidal was not Olver.

“Fat bloody good seer you are,” she muttered, getting up. “Thanks for nothing, Captain Obvious.”

Predicted Winner: Birgitte

You have until Saturday, January 28th at 9:00 p.m. PST to vote.
White Ajah Aes Sedai...Bonded to BenT-Gaidin...Sis of Nia, MJF, and Mighte...Mentor of Many

#2 Nyanna al'Meara

Nyanna al'Meara

    Yes, this is dork.

  • Members
  • 36,081 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Traversing the galaxy for intergalactic travels to Pigfarts

Posted 22 January 2012 - 02:29 PM

Hahahahaaaaa, hilarious!

Birgitte all the way...she's a fighter, been a warrior for millions of years and lives. There's no way Min can match her ability. Also, Min can only see random snatches of the future, she wouldn't be able to predict Birgitte's moves or something. It's obvious Birgitte has all kinds of tricks up her sleeves, Min's no match for her.

Though I doubt any of them would try to kill each other in WoT RL. Nicely done, Birgitte must have had s***loads to drink to lose focus like that :laugh:

rotation.gif

ε> ~ Bonded to BB ~ Muer'Shen to Heart ~ Bonded to Arez ~ Ayla's Twinneh ~ <3

Wanna meet BB & me IRL? We're backpacking the UK soon! Go to this thread! http://www.dragonmou...e-uk/?p=3260818


#3 master

master
  • Members
  • 90 posts

Posted 22 January 2012 - 04:54 PM

birgite versus... wait..what. is there even an argument in this. Unless she is ambushed birgitee would win any time.

#4 vanceme

vanceme
  • Members
  • 55 posts
  • Gender:Not Telling

Posted 22 January 2012 - 05:22 PM

Ahahaha. Well played Luckers, well played.

#5 Rogue...Jedi

Rogue...Jedi
  • Members
  • 6 posts

Posted 22 January 2012 - 05:58 PM

At close range, I'd take Min - she can really handle her knives. However, if there's any distance whatsoever between them, then Birgitte wins, and it's not even remotely close.

#6 Bougher

Bougher
  • Members
  • 24 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 22 January 2012 - 08:09 PM

the only thing is i thinck that Gaidal is Olver cause in the book the keep on saying on how ugly Olver is and that Gaildal had already been born before briget got torn out

Edited by Bougher, 22 January 2012 - 08:11 PM.

<boughya>

#7 not too hasty

not too hasty
  • Members
  • 11 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Hong Kong

Posted 22 January 2012 - 08:13 PM

At close range, I'd take Min - she can really handle her knives. However, if there's any distance whatsoever between them, then Birgitte wins, and it's not even remotely close.

No, Birgitte had fight alongside Mat in Ebou Dar using melee weapon, and she didn't hurt in contrast to Mat.
And Birgitte win for sure. No doubt about that :sleep:

Edited by not too hasty, 22 January 2012 - 08:14 PM.

I don't know why anyone would like egwene, yes she is capable. But she is just a person that you may be able to tolerate as partner but not as a friend. I am surprised so many people( at least post) defending her. I want her to be taught a lesson.

#8 Verbal32

Verbal32

    Actually Barmacral

  • Administrators
  • 258,715 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:The gutter

Posted 22 January 2012 - 09:26 PM

I'm still laughing Luckers - awesome!

jc-1.jpg

 


#9 Luckers

Luckers

    Hostile Witness

  • Members
  • 14,970 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Sydney Australia

Posted 22 January 2012 - 10:21 PM

the only thing is i thinck that Gaidal is Olver cause in the book the keep on saying on how ugly Olver is and that Gaildal had already been born before briget got torn out


Yeah a lot of people have thought that over time, but RJ confirmed that he is not. Hence the joke.

I'm still laughing Luckers - awesome!


Haha cheers! I loved the ending of your Lan one.

Follow Me On Twitter: or check out my WoT FAQ and Theories

------

Terez: The word 'douche' appears twice in the database. Both times it's you


Luckers: I'm nothing if not a creature of habit.

------

Brandon Sanderson: I KNOW I did a good job. Not perfect, but very good. I know it as an artist.


#10 kraefzke

kraefzke
  • Members
  • 36 posts
  • Gender:Not Telling

Posted 23 January 2012 - 02:56 AM

Made my day! While not as close to the style of the books as some of the others, this was by far the funniest write-up to date! Great work!

#11 TinaHel

TinaHel

    Hiding in the Shadow

  • Members
  • 20,599 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Land of the polar bears.

Posted 23 January 2012 - 03:31 AM

LMAO

Posted Image


First Sister and Bonded to Leelou


#12 Guest_PiotrekS_*

Guest_PiotrekS_*
  • Guests

Posted 23 January 2012 - 03:50 AM

I can't read it. Poor Min... :sad:

#13 Leyrann

Leyrann

    Sir Ley

  • Members
  • 13,117 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Summoner's Rift

Posted 23 January 2012 - 06:03 AM

I don't know if Birgette would win on close distance... Would be the one who throws a knife first, I think. However, because Birgitte would win at long range, I vote Birgitte.

I like friendly games, and I suppose everyone does. So, I would like to ask everyone playing mafia, which I want to be a fun, friendly game too, to be nice, and to just not be generally unhelpful, or doing something like refusing to answer an honest question that in no way harms your chances of survival. And too, an important reason I'm writing this despite earlier reactions about similar things, is that I don't want to get mad, but if I feel like either someone is mad at me for no reason, or someone is irritating me while he knows it, I just can't help it, no matter how much I want.


#14 gwenifer

gwenifer

    piccolina

  • Members
  • 192 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Free City of Danzig, Poland

Posted 23 January 2012 - 06:29 AM

It's more sad than funny :sad:

I just hope that aMoL will be much more satisfying than "Merlin" finale...


#15 Dream

Dream
  • Members
  • 207 posts
  • Gender:Not Telling

Posted 23 January 2012 - 09:04 AM

Funny stuff. I realize that the situation has to be forced but Birgitte was a bit too bloodthirsty for me. I mean, what were Rand and Elayne doing in there--trying to kill each other? (Maybe I should add "literally"?)

Poor Min. Her best defense always was that nobody wanted to kill her.

#16 Guest_PiotrekS_*

Guest_PiotrekS_*
  • Guests

Posted 23 January 2012 - 09:35 AM

It's more sad than funny :sad:


Exactly :sad:

#17 Alric

Alric
  • Members
  • 350 posts
  • Gender:Male

Posted 23 January 2012 - 12:02 PM

Poor MIn :sad:

But I won't give any sympathy votes to skew the results so I'll just refrain from voting on this one.

Poor Min. Her best defense always was that nobody wanted to kill her.



Well, there is a thread dedicated to who should die in the last book and she got several votes there. At least it got better as the voting progressed, she was in the top 3 or 4 at the beginning.



#18 sleepinghour

sleepinghour
  • Members
  • 545 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Galad's pants

Posted 23 January 2012 - 04:11 PM


Poor Min. Her best defense always was that nobody wanted to kill her.



Well, there is a thread dedicated to who should die in the last book and she got several votes there. At least it got better as the voting progressed, she was in the top 3 or 4 at the beginning.

It is true of the books, though. With the sad exception of Rand in TGS, no one has tried to kill Min (which is probably why she grew overly confident of her ability to act as Rand's bodyguard—it's easy to think you're Xena when you've never actually had to fight anyone :wink:). When the Maidens decided to give Rand a beating in ACoS, they batted her aside like a fly. Aviendha also seemed to think she could take out Min before she even finished whirling her knives.

#19 Luckers

Luckers

    Hostile Witness

  • Members
  • 14,970 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Sydney Australia

Posted 23 January 2012 - 05:25 PM

Funny stuff. I realize that the situation has to be forced but Birgitte was a bit too bloodthirsty for me. I mean, what were Rand and Elayne doing in there--trying to kill each other? (Maybe I should add "literally"?)


As I imagined it, Rand and Elayne were having adult play time, not trying to hurt each other. The way the bond twisted that added to Birgitte's misery over Gaidal and the alcohol. It was as close a way I could figure to make this seem viable. :)

Follow Me On Twitter: or check out my WoT FAQ and Theories

------

Terez: The word 'douche' appears twice in the database. Both times it's you


Luckers: I'm nothing if not a creature of habit.

------

Brandon Sanderson: I KNOW I did a good job. Not perfect, but very good. I know it as an artist.


#20 Guest_PiotrekS_*

Guest_PiotrekS_*
  • Guests

Posted 23 January 2012 - 06:20 PM


Funny stuff. I realize that the situation has to be forced but Birgitte was a bit too bloodthirsty for me. I mean, what were Rand and Elayne doing in there--trying to kill each other? (Maybe I should add "literally"?)


As I imagined it, Rand and Elayne were having adult play time, not trying to hurt each other. The way the bond twisted that added to Birgitte's misery over Gaidal and the alcohol. It was as close a way I could figure to make this seem viable. :)


You suceeded in making it viable and it is well written, but I personally would prefer that'd have failed...
Poor Min :sad: